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06-Jan-2020 19:04

According to Chen Haiyan, a popular dating coach on Chinese social media, this conflict results in anxiety for the parents, especially mothers, and depression for the daughters."Every time a woman calls home, her mom will cry and yell and ask why she hasn't married yet," she says, "Their grandmothers will then say that they don't want to die before seeing you get married."Stressed, scared and stigmatized, many women will give in and rush into a loveless marriage before age 30 and then rush out of it within one or two years, Wu Di says, thus driving up the divorce rate in China.

Nevertheless, as the idea that it's ok to be single past a certain age continues to gain acceptance in China, women will have options that didn't exist in the past.

A new report by the Ministry of Civil Affairs shows that the number of divorces in China jumped 8 percent last year, and, for the first time in 10 years, the increase of the divorce rate has outpaced the growth of the marriage rate.

As a result, more members of China's "post-80 generation," referring to those born in the 1980s, are opting for love and attraction -- rather than practical considerations -- in finding a partner., says Chinese culture emphasizes honor, duty, and responsibility in relationships -- not love.It's been like that for thousands of years," Wu says."Young people have higher expectations for marriage now.Challenges remain to get to this level, but both Wu and Joy Chen are optimistic: they believe the term "leftover women" will disappear in the next decade as more women remain single after age 27.For Nancy Ji, divorced and lost at 31, life has never been better at 37: She has recently started seeing someone she met at Coucou8 events, and her perspective on what she wants has changed."Now I hope I can find someone who I can connect with based on interest and personalities," Ji says.

As a result, more members of China's "post-80 generation," referring to those born in the 1980s, are opting for love and attraction -- rather than practical considerations -- in finding a partner., says Chinese culture emphasizes honor, duty, and responsibility in relationships -- not love.It's been like that for thousands of years," Wu says."Young people have higher expectations for marriage now.Challenges remain to get to this level, but both Wu and Joy Chen are optimistic: they believe the term "leftover women" will disappear in the next decade as more women remain single after age 27.For Nancy Ji, divorced and lost at 31, life has never been better at 37: She has recently started seeing someone she met at Coucou8 events, and her perspective on what she wants has changed."Now I hope I can find someone who I can connect with based on interest and personalities," Ji says.Leta Hong Fincher, a Ph D candidate in sociology at Tsinghua University and author of a forthcoming book about leftover women and Chinese gender inequality, says that the Chinese government wants "leftover women" to create "quality" babies by scaring the women into marriage.